Proverbs 18:19 A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city: and their contentions are like the bars of a castle. The reference in the text is to - I. A DIFFICULTY EVERYWHERE ACKNOWLEDGED. It seems to have been universally felt that a "brother offended" is very hard indeed "to be won." It is more easy to effect a reconciliation between strangers than between those united by ties of blood. Hence a family feud is usually a very long as well as a very sad one. This does not seem to be a local or a national peculiarity. What Solomon wrote in his land and age might be written by any English or continental moralist today. It is human. II. ITS EXPLANATION. 1. It is an aggravated difficulty, inasmuch as the bitterness aroused is more intense. For always in proportion to the fulness of our love is the greatness of our wrath. Anger is love reversed. Whom we love the most we are in danger of disliking the most; it is against his own wife that the madman first turns his hand. And how should we love another with all the affection we feel for the companion of our childhood and our youth, the sharer of our joys and sufferings from the very cradle and under the parental roof? 2. We shrink with greatest sensitiveness from humbling ourselves before our kindred. Reconciliation usually means apology, and apology means a measure of humiliation. And we do not like to humble our hearts before one with whom we have had and may have so much to do. 3. We are inclined to "stand upon the order of our going;" each thinks the other should make the first move; the younger thinks the elder should because he is the elder, and the elder the younger because he is the younger. 4. We are apt to resent interposition as interference; to any peacemaker who would intervene we are inclined to say, "Do not intrude into our family secrets." III. OUR DUTY IN VIEW OF THIS FACT. It is clearly this: 1. To avoid all serious differences with our near kindred; (1) to heal at once the first small breach that may occur, for while a rupture may be beyond remedy, a small difference is easily healed; (2) to consider that almost any sacrifice of money, or of position, or of goods is worth making to retain the love of the children of our own parents, the playmates of our childhood and our youth. 2. To make a determined effort, after earnest thought and prayer, to master the difficulty we find in our heart, and make the first overture to the offended brother. Be shall we win a really noble victory over ourselves; so shall we gain the warm approval of the Prince of peace. - C. Parallel Verses KJV: A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city: and their contentions are like the bars of a castle. |
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